Choices were made.
[Everyone welcome Sam Arthurs to Destructoid! As you may have noticed, we put out a call for freelancers recently, and Sam answered that call. They have experience writing for several websites, including Gameranx, and they love creepy indie horror games and creepy Metroidvanias, which in fact rule – Chris Carter.]
Now that we’ve all been down a Pokémon rabbit hole for over a week, it’s natural to contemplate the important questions. Who is the cutest pocket monster of all time? While coming up with this list, I thought long and hard about how to best answer this impossible question, and I landed on writing about the objectively cute versus my own odd sense of cuteness.
For example, I think scrawny little Salandit has a shifty look about him, and I just want to put him in my pocket. Not everyone would rank him as highly as I would though. Instead, here are 10 Pokémon that I think most of us can agree are adorable.
Cubone makes the list for being such a sad baby. It seems so hardcore at first, wearing its mother’s skull as a helmet and wielding a bone as a weapon. But it’s also quick to burst into tears and is considered the “lonely Pokémon.” If that doesn’t make you just want to hug it, then I don’t know what will.
Pikachu is a star for a reason. This lightning mouse looks cuddly, definitely has a sense of humor, and runs on the cutest little feet. There’s also something so special about a wide-eyed, squishy teddy bear with boundaries. Try to hug a Pikachu before it’s ready, and you will regret it.
Rockruff is a fluffy rock puppy who just wants to play. The way it prances as it walks makes you feel happy that it is happy. With its folded ears and fluffy tail, it looks sweet and gentle, but Rockruff shows off its scrappy side with a habit of biting and playing rock chicken. It throws the rocks around its neck at the ground and attacks if its opponent flinches. What a good boi!
Dratini is a water noodle with big eyes and winglike fins on the side of its head. It’s shy, often running away when you try to capture it, and it has an adorable coo-ing sound. It sleeps curled up in a small ball on the shore. I rest my case.
Rowlet looks very polite with its leaf bowtie. It is a very good listener, turning to face its trainer while waiting on commands. Rowlet is sleepy during the day, but it finds tight, dark spaces comforting. Don’t be surprised if you find one nesting in your bag.
Okay, fine. Bidoof is basically just a cutesy beaver. It is only a foot tall and lives by the water where it constantly gnaws on wood to keep its teeth from growing too long. However, it is in the category of “plump mouse” in the Pokedex, and I can’t handle how cute that is. Its abilities are “Simple” and “Unaware,” and then you look at this image of a round-faced, bucktoothed, fluffy groundhog with small webbed feet. Bidoof is perfect.
Mew may be powerful and mysterious, but it is also playful and sweet. Whether or not its strange look is cute is debatable, but the way it floats around, spinning and giggling with its hands over its mouth is definitely cute. It is kind of cat-like with its mewing sound and tendency to delight in gently pranking people.
Of the newest generation of starter Pokémon, Sprigatito is hands-down the cutest. This grassy-green kitten has big eyes and fluff on his neck, face, and tail. He’s a happy cat who often purrs and smiles, and there isn’t much cuter in this world than a happy cat.
Eevee is the OG sweetheart Pokémon. Nothing but big ears and fluff, Eevee has so much potential to evolve into some lovely and powerful Pokémon, but I wouldn’t blame you if you let it stay small and sweet for as long as possible. It loves to be petted and held, so it makes a perfect companion.
According to the Pokedex, Shaymin is only eight inches tall! This grassy hedgehog is innocence incarnate. It can turn polluted land into a lush field of flowers, where it likes to hang out. It wears a big flower on its head, smiles a lot, and has tiny feet. Don’t you just want to scoop it up?